I’m not sure if you knew this, but last night, the government shut down. No, really, I’m pretty sure it did. Maybe they’ll start it up again soon, but the gates will remain locked so that no can ever go in, and no can ever get out…Wonka-style.
I found this alarming, but also, was pretty busy googling animated gifs that best illustrate how I feel when I know I should go to the gym but am too busy eating a family-sized bag of Hershey Kisses in my bed and building little sculptures out of the empty foil wrappers.
But today, with the shut down still in place, very little in my life has changed. In fact, if not for Twitter, I probably wouldn’t have noticed that the government had ceased to function.
Just as I was beginning to worry that I lacked the appropriate amount of concern about this debacle, I realized that there are at least ten other institutions that could shut down completely without me noticing, which, somehow makes me feel better.
1. Panera Bread
2. Fantasy Football
3. ToughMudder Races
5. One Direction
6. Dave and Buster’s
7. Star Wars-themed Lego’s
9. Jenny Craig
10. Fleet Bank (which actually did shut down, and despite the fact that they had all my money at the time, I didn’t notice.)